Working....

yap... still working at this hour.... thoughts ran through my head again... I still cannot believe what Denise told me.... I thought back on the times we were together and I thought back on the times when I hugged him and wouldn't let go.... I really wanted to make things work.... I was willing to give up almost everything.... but know what did I get in return, it wasn't enough, you didn't try hard enough, no point just trying, you must try hard enough... same thing that I would want to say... you tried... you tried to make me feel loved, to shower affection, but you didn't try hard enough.... initially I really did appreciate everything he did, until he started the 'you didn't try hard enough' thing... Life's not a box of chocolate, not a bed of roses, but its definately a paradox... its like the chicken and egg analogy, which came first? Chicken or egg, without chicken, no egg, no egg, no chicken.... I think its wasn't either, I think God created a chick and let it grew.... another 30 mins to go before I knock off... but no one to accompany me down for illegal break... haven't been concentrating on my job... but lucky for me, my customers were nice, they didn't screw me up... my thoughts are so inconsistent now.... I guess I'm confused... Denise thinks I'm depressed and should see a doctor... I don't think I'm sick... I'm fine... really... I don't need a doctor.... I just need the reason.... my teammates are going home, but I"m still stuck for 30 mins... sux... Friday doing OT and Sun also doing OT.... this job kinda take my attention off things... but he takes my attention off my job too.... see... another paradox... back to my work.....